I remember six years ago when I was going through my divorce.
First off, they'd have to get married to do that...How did he know what each of them would decide?
Second, I not only took offense, but flat out denied that that would
happen to them.
I am not a psychic.
I cannot see the future.
But I truly
believe that my children have a better chance at marriage than us…
Because of the fact that their mother and father are divorced.
I know the statistics, and it's true my parents are divorced…and now I am divorced.
So you could look at me and
assume that it will indeed carry down to my children's marriages.
Though I will argue that
fact because
- My parents never told me why they divorced.
- They never told me that they started out badly to begin with.
- They never shared with me what they did wrong once married.
- My father got re-married and proceeded to repeat the process above.
- My mother was not involved in my upbringing after the divorce.
So...now a little on me and my divorce:
- At each step in the process of divorce I have explained to my children (age appropriately) what is happening.
- I've explained what went wrong (that I am aware of) and what I would do right next time...additionally I teach them things about themselves to help them know who they are and what they want. As well as teach them about healthy/non-healthy relationships.
- And it seems as if I am getting my chance to show them a better, more healthy relationship and therefore they will have a model and a whole new education (that I never had).
- Without education on what they did wrong, how would know what to do right?
It is what it is, but it doesn’t have to be for my kids.
Can I 100% guarantee that my kids will not divorce? No, because statistically speaking 50% of ALL marriages end in divorce and personally speaking I cannot predict what their future spouse will be like, do or what my grown children will do either...but I do believe, if handled correctly, divorce can be the a tool to teach children the best lessons in self-discovery, marriage and yes, divorce.
Can I 100% guarantee that my kids will not divorce? No, because statistically speaking 50% of ALL marriages end in divorce and personally speaking I cannot predict what their future spouse will be like, do or what my grown children will do either...but I do believe, if handled correctly, divorce can be the a tool to teach children the best lessons in self-discovery, marriage and yes, divorce.
Read more on Kids of Divorce
Truly,
Amber
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